October 2009: An Update

I guess it's time for the (by-now customary) bullet-point update.

• Over the Hallowe'en weekend I had the pleasure of dressing up two days in a row. On Friday I hacked together a shirt, tie and some basic makeup into some kind of corporate zombie outfit, and took part in the Critical Zombie Mass - a spooky-themed variant of the bike ride from last month. Despite the freezing weather we had a great turnout, with 40-odd freaks on two wheels seeping through the city streets to the tune of 'Thriller' and 'Tubular Bells'. Great fun, though I retired early to get home and work on my costume for the following night - Harvey 'Two Face' Dent from The Dark Knight, in all his charred, ripped glory. I wasn't entirely happy with the way it turned out - I had more planned for my 'bad eye' that had to be scrapped at the last minute, and the exposed jaw didn't look too hot in my mind - but everyone at Bingo's party on Saturday went mad over it. I even got presented with a bottle of champagne at the end of the night for Best Costume, though it might have been more of an award for having a high pain threshold - the plastic device I had manufactured to achieve Harvey's trademark one-sided snarl was uncomfortable to say the least.* Not to mention that I couldn't eat or drink for the two hours I was wearing it (I removed the mouthpiece later that night to partake of refreshments). Still, a fantastic weekend all round. I'm thinking a damaged T-800 or Dr. Jonathan 'Scarecrow' Crane for my 2010 effort.
• I'm almost finished my current web project - a holistic therapy site with content management system and social network integration. Once that's done, I'll be focusing on a few personal endeavours: an online portfolio for myself, and a site for my music (I have a name for the 'artist' in mind). In the wake of my Judge Head 'phase', I'm inherently suspicious of any blatant self-promotion or brand-building, but I realise it's a necessary evil to get the music out there and heard. So expect to see me on MySpace, Facebook, PureVolume and much more as we head into the New Year. There's the small matter of actually finishing the album to deal with, of course...
  
• Nina and I celebrated our first year together a few weeks ago. I can't express the full extent of how happy she makes me, because the words always seem to fall short. So I'll have to be content with saying that she's the love of my life. Again, the words just don't capture it; hopefully my actions do.
• Work has been somewhat frustrating lately. Every time I think I've broken through and can actually see progress in the main project, another obstacle comes crashing down in front of me; most of them seem to originate within the company, rather than from outside. Still, I'm going to persevere in the short term, though I just can't see me being there this time next year. Though I've said that before.

More to come later this month (honestly).

NJM

* The white plastic of the jawbone, meanwhile, was culled from my old Judge Head mask. Cutting it up was a symbolic moment indeed.

Thinly-Spread And Lightly Toasted

Last month is the first month I've gone entirely without making a blog post since time began. I'll be updating with pictures, tunes and hopefully a few new links this month. In the meantime, and to celebrate this dubious milestone, here's a nice song.



NJM

Wake Up, Time To Die(t): On Self-Neglect

It's become a real effort just to blog recently. It's not like I haven't got a lot to talk about - I have new web projects for four different clients on the go recently, and that's outside of work. I'm also at my most creatively inspired in ages, with a new style of lyric-writing that's really working and producing results. At this rate I could have my first album fully written and demoed by the end of October (©2001 Famous Last Words, Inc.). I also recently took part in a Critical Mass event in Belfast, which I helped organise and did graphic design for (I even bit the bullet and set up a ShTwitter feed for them). It was great fun to be out on my bike again for the first time in over 4 months, and avoiding arrest was also nice. My enthusiasm lessened when I saw the subsequent photos of myself, with my sunken eyes and protruding beer gut.

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Despite being in the best mental shape of my adult life, I've been neglecting myself physically. My fitness is lacking, I'm tired a great deal of the time, and I've even developed skin irritation on my leg. Stress from work might be a factor, perhaps exacerbated by my sense of being devalued or taken advantage of by management. It's also a bitter irony that I no longer feel compelled to hide the cracks in my personality (real or imagined) by cultivating an external 'image'. Where in the past my frequent gym visits were the result of narcissism and paranoia, these influences are no longer as compelling. I guess the trick now is to become compelled by the desire to stay fit and healthy, rather than some misguided attempt to look a certain way (though looking good would be a great bonus). The bike is back on the road and the gym is just around the corner - I think a diet is now in order. I did it before, and I can do it again. Watch this space.

So there's just a few of the things I haven't been blogging about. And would you look at that - a blog post!

NJM

Misanthropic Thought Of The Day

This probably isn't very cool to say, but I'll say it anyway: in my opinion, any parent who blogs, Facebooks, Tweets or otherwise comments on the web as their own baby - complete with lolcat-style babyspeak and made-up words - needs to be put against the wall and beat about the face with a bat.

Enjoy the rest of your day.

NJM

Childhood Memories Of Horror, Resurfacing

Something popped into my head the other day that has been buried, dormant in my subconscious, for over two decades. I can't recall what brought it out from the murk, but it resurfaced from the depths of my childhood as clearly as when I first experienced it.

One day back in my fourth year of primary school, as a boy of only 7 years old, I and my classmates were each asked to pick a random book from the classroom library. Browsing through the expansive if battered collection of paperbacks, I discovered a scary-looking book called EAT THEM ALIVE. It turned out to be what I now recognize as pulp/exploitation horror, where naked indigenous women are devoured by giant insects at the behest of deviant criminals (I think). Gruesome descriptions of flopping amputated breasts, entrails, screaming villagers and twenty-foot insects all rattled around in my young brain. I knew even then that the book should not have been there. By that time, though, I couldn't dismiss the images.

What the hell was the book doing in a primary school classroom? Was it an oversight, negligence, or some sick prank? And what impact did it have on my then-innocent mind? The fact that I can recall it so clearly after all these years might speak volumes - uses-and-gratifications theory can hardly apply to a seven-year-old kid, can it?

As I often say: Freud would have a field day.

Status Report (August '09 Edition)

I've been spread so thin of late that blogging hasn't got a look-in. Between an increased workload, spending time with Nina, salvaging friendships and maintaining creativity, I barely have time to exercise, let alone blog. With that in mind, expect this particular entry to be quick-fire and disjointed, like Uzi-toting custard.

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• I think it's time for the hair to come off again. I had hoped to wait until Hallowe'en to shave it off, doing so as part of my ambitious Harvey Two-Face costume, but I can no longer stand its presence. It has to go. Sorry to anyone who liked it (hi Mum).
  
• Getting my bike cleaned and fixed today, in an effort to battle the ever-growing bulge above my belt. I'm really starting to feel uncomfortable in my own skin, even if the outside appearance is more or less the same. Despite having reduced my alcohol intake considerably in the past year, I've also reduced my gym time. Not good. [EDIT: the roads outside work are flooded thanks to the rainfall. Might stay in tonight after all.]
  
• Earlier this month I took a week off work to hole up in a small recording studio owned and run by Nina's genius brother (they're a family of geniuses, it would seem). With nothing but keyboards, mics, guitars and signal processors for company, I was free to get on the mic and lay down full-throated, aggressive vocals - something I simply can't do in my own house. It was very liberating. The results were varied, due largely to the many rewrites I felt necessary to perform during the recording process. However, I have a lot of raw material to work with, and hope to start producing finished tracks once I give my ears a good rest.
• On a related note, I've been rehearsing with Happi in an effort to pick up where I left off last year and get playing in public again. My goal is to get Denise on board too, and perform some original material between the three of us. Time, as always, is the enemy, but I'm more confident and determined than ever.
  
• The glut of zombie-themed content currently populating XBox Live (several shitty Indie Games, L4D2 trailers, and so on) has led to my shelving of McGrathi Apocalypse once again. The game design itself is quite solid - it would make a pretty good boardgame, actually. Sadly, I can't see it being developed for XNA given the general zombie bandwagonism currently in force. I'll focus my energies on 14 Days, which is a far more original and unique idea anyway.
• I've made a resolution to improve my overall graphic design and production skills with a view to exploring several ideas that have been rattling around for ages: a customized tarot deck for Nina, some t-shirt designs, some large-size wall art for my room, and much more. In addition, I've taken my first tentative steps into non-linear video editing in the hope of finally producing that zombie/slasher/torture short film that McGrathy and I have been talking about for a decade or so.
• I recently finished my first game of Fallout 3. To call it a 'playthrough' would be wrong, because I barely saw a third of the gameworld in the course of my story. It really felt like I had lived and died in the game as myself, thanks to the degree of freedom I felt throughout. Even better, it means that there's a whole other landscape out there that I'm dying to explore in my next attempt (perhaps as a deliberately cruel and evil character - I was eulogized in the closing cutscene as a pure, uncorrupted wanderer thanks to my actions and attitude in the game). A landmark title in my gaming 'career', not least because my fellow Ballymena escapee Liam Neeson played my father in it.
  
• Speaking of landmark titles, one more thing: after getting a fantastic deal at Cash Converters, I'm going home tonight to finally play Metal Gear Solid 4 on my new(ish) PlayStation3. IT. IS. TIME.
  

It's depressing how similar my creative intentions sound to those I had about a year ago. The march of progress can indeed be a slow one. That's more than enough for now - keep on rockin'.

NJM

Funk Metal: A Galactica Dream

Following a three-episode Battlestar Galactica session with Steve last night, I wound up dreaming that I was at some lavish evening gala comprised of Sixes, Threes, Eights and That Kevin Spacey-Looking Motherfucker™. One of the buffet tables had a selection of turntables, knobs and faders on it, and I was trading turns with an impassive, body-popping Dr. Baltar, hammering out all kinds of scratching, stuttering big beat (kinda like that Coke ad from the '90s). Every now and then I would look back over my shoulder and try and fire up the crowd, which was regarding our antics with a mixture of bemusement and indifference. Eventually an authority figure (not Adama) came over and whispered in my ear to stop making such a racket. The moment the music stopped, however, the assembled Cylons began voicing their dissatisfaction that the booming grooves had ended. Then I woke up.

Rumours that I built Nina in my dungeon laboratory refuse to disappear.

NJM